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Open-Ended Dialogue

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During open-ended dialogue you have the opportunity to:

  •   Practice using the communication tool of dialogue without interruption.
  •   Explore each other’s feelings.
  •   Get to know your spouse in a deep and intimate way.

The Team Couples are available in the conference room to answer questions, or if you reach an impasse or want help.


1. After this talk, dialogue for about 10 minutes on the love letters you just wrote. 2. Thenselectanewquestion.

  1. Separate to write – try different sides of the room, or one of you in the bathroom, etc.
  2. Then come together to exchange, dialogue, and select a new question.

Some ideas for selecting questions: Feelings you began sharing today but did not finish. Topics from today’s handouts. Try taking turns choosing questions.


WRITE, EXCHANGE, DIALOGUE, SELECT Write a love letter to my spouse:

  • Pray before writing. Focus on spouse.
  • Write for 10 minutes.
  • Begin with a loving greeting and a most endearing quality. End with loving words.
  • Very briefly answer the question. Use most of my letter to write my feelings.
  • Share feelings honestly and lovingly, so my mate will feel what I am feeling.Exchange our love letters:
  • Sit rather than lie down.
  • Pray together. Exchange letters with non-verbal affection.
  • Receive my spouse’s letter and feelings lovingly.
  • Read the letter twice, silently. Ignore grammar and spelling errors.Dialogue on our feelings:
  • To begin, each spouse tells how I feel after reading your love letter.
  • Choose one strong feeling for our dialogue, from any one of 4 key sources:
    1. My love letter
    2. My spouse’s love letter
    3. My “now” feelings in response to my spouse’s love letter
    4. My spouse’s “now” feelings in response to my love letter
  • Dialogue only on that feeling for 10 minutes. Watch for and use non-verbal messages.
  • Goal of dialogue is unity: to reach oneness of feeling.

Select our question for our next dialogue.